NonRAL Man of the Week: Michael Vick takes up smoking rock in prison…

He must have, or he’s the stupidest fuck on the planet…he certainly wasn’t the best QB in the league prior to becoming public enemy #1 and going to prison for dog fighting, but now he thinks he can still “… earn as much as $10 million a year or more” and be one of the highest paid players in the league. The guy couldn’t even hit an open man 10 yards down the field and he wants 10 mil a year?!? He knows he took part in a ‘hobby’ that celebrates the killing of man’s best friend for financial gain, right? That makes him less popular then the fat kid who swims with his shirt on….he’ll be lucky to be signed by the Raiders or the Sikh-F-L (it has been labeled this due to the players making such a paltry income, they have to live with a Sikh family) with his tarnished reputation…All that prison sodomy must’ve clouded his judgment…

A-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli a-milli-ma-milli, yeah that's right, 10 o' those.

Priests add theft to laundry list of criminal offences

Priests have a shitty life, they can’t have sex, they have to wear cloaks and their lives revolve around some guy who hangs out on a ‘t’, Jebus or something…anyway these two priests were tired of living their modest lifestyles and decided to embezzle 8 Mil out of the church.

“John Skehan and Francis Guinan were accused in 2006 of skimming money from collection plates and bequests at their church in Delray Beach, Florida, and spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on real estate, travel, rare coins (What? Why?) and girlfriends.”

Take, thy Father, into thy mouth son

Seems to me that these guys had it figured out; they had very low living expenses and no real need for excess, but decided they could get it so fuck it why not? And they also figured out that they were 64 and 79 respectively upon arrest and that copious amount of money and lavish goods and vacations are necessary at that age to pick up skanks. The one thing they didn’t know though is that unless you are trying to impress 12 year old boys, rare coins won’t get you anywhere…oh wait. At least in jail they will be the Alter boys for a change….